Lost In the Prairies.....Found by God

Messy Mondays where I share what God has been showing me through the messiness of life.  It is my personal belief that this walk isn't clean and crisp and straight or narrow.  It's wide and twisted and mucky and messy.  It's about the ups and the downs, but through it all God is there with us.  

 This week on the way to church, I played a cd a dear friend made for me.  The cd is filled with songs to uplift me and encourage me in my walk.  I normally immediately play Blessings or Better Than a Hallelujah by Amy Grant, but Captivated by Vicky Beeching started playing.  I was immediately drawn to the song.  I started listening to the words.  "I am Captivated by you." 

The definition of captivated is : To attract and hold by charm, beauty, or excellence.  The archaic meaning is captured.  I don't just want to be attracted and held by God.  I want to be captured by Him.  I want to be His captive.  I want Him in control.  I struggle and fight Him.  I throw temper tantrums when I don't get my own way.  But I always come back.  The lyrics "try as I may, I cannot look away" speak of my relationship with God.  I am like Sam.  Sam runs from me.  He is quick and tries to get as far as he can.  But then as I am just about to start running after him, he looks back for me.  Making sure I am still there watching out for him.  Knowing that just by seeing me there he is safe.  

I may try to run and hide from God.  I may even try to turn my back on Him on occasions in defiance.  But He is always there in everything I see or hear.  I cannot totally ignore Him.  I am drawn to Him.  I need to look back.  I need to know He is there watching me as I "toddle" along through life.  When I do glimpse Him I am struck in awe and wonder.  I am entranced by Him.  I am captivated by the Father more and more as I learn to become more like Him and embrace being held by Him.

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Your laughter it echoes like a joyous thunder
Your whisper it warms me like a summer breeze
Your anger is fiercer than the sun in its splendour
You’re close and yet full of mystery
Ever since the day that I saw Your face
Try as I may, I cannot look away, I cannot look away…

Captivated by You
I am captivated by You
May my life be one unbroken gaze
Fixed upon the beauty of Your face

Beholding is becoming, so as You fill my gaze
I become more like You and my heart is changed
Beholding is becoming, so as You fill my view
Transform me into the likeness of You

This is what I ask, for all my days
That I may, never look away, never look away…
No other could ever be as beautiful
No other could ever steal my heart away
I just can’t look away…